my modern day miracle.... really!

every time i need something i ask my Father in Heaven. he always answers my prayers. it may not be the answer i want, but he answers non the less. well about 2 weeks ago my mom lost some tickets i gave to her. i suggested that she pray to find them and i would do the same. when i prayed, i had the feeling that it was out of my hands. that it was my mom's thing. i didn't really like that answer. i was a bit offended. don't ask me why, but i was. (you are really seeing a major weakness of mine, kinda getting to know the real me.) my mom didn't find the tickets until it was too late. so, i wondered why my prayer didn't help my mom find these tickets. what went wrong? did i do something to make the Lord slow to hear my prayer. I really took this hard. (silly, i know.)
well a while later, i lost my cell phone. i just could not find it. one day went by... then 2.... i tried to call it. then 3 days. my parents tried to call it. eventually my phone died so that now every time we would call it would go straight to my voice mail. a week had gone by and i really didn't want to pray for help in finding it because i felt that my prayer just wouldn't be answered and i would loose even more faith. (the more i write of this story, the more i see how silly i was.) there are some phone numbers on my cell that are very important, and i needed them. finally after a week and a half i decided to pray for help.
i let Heavenly Father know all i had been going through, apologizing about my getting offended, yet letting him know that i was lacking the faith that i felt i would need to get the help i was asking for. but, i asked to be blessed with faith. (this may seem so silly to you, but it was such a huge thing for me. knowing that my Father in Heaven cares enough for me that he would help me find a silly ol' cell phone. that's a big deal to me.) anyways.... i asked to have him help me to think of places to look. i would do the work of looking, but i needed to know where to even start. i thought that i had looked every where. oh, i had added in that the numbers on my cell where for people who really needed me to call them, so this wasn't just for my sake, it was for the sake of many others who needed me. i had the thought to look in my couch. now, was that me making this up or was it an inspiration? i shoved the dout aside and tried my hardest to practice my faith. well i went to bed knowing that the next day i would search the couch.
in the back of my mind all morning i was thinking about my searching the couch. then in all the hustle and bustle i forgot. i happened to sit on the couch and as i looked over to the arm rest, there it was, my dead cell phone!!!! i was so surprised and happy. i called all my boys in and told them that the night before i had prayed and asked for help in finding my phone and then there it was. we all knelt down and said a prayer thanking Father for this little miracle.
later i called todd to see where he found my phone. this is the story he told me. he had just said goodbye to me. he was on his way to work. i was on my way to bed. ( todd leaves around 12:30am. i had stayed up so i could say goodbye to him.) well he had brought his extra pair of clothes down stairs and set them on the couch. he sat down to get his shoes on and he heard a buzzing sound. he thought it was his phone so he checked it out. it didn't look like it was his phone. he heard the buzzing again and knew it wasn't his phone. he knew my phone was near..... so he checked in the couch. between a console and the recliner chair on the couch. there it was. he set it on the arm rest. then went to work.
now when i heard this story i was so stoked. it was in the couch. I was praying for this right around the same time todd was finding it. talk about proof that Heavenly Father hears and answers my prayers.
later on i realized one more thing. over a week ago my phone had died. all calls had been going directly to my voice mail. it was totally off and dead. how did todd hear the buzzing of a completely dead phone? nice..... just a nice little touch to my modern day miracle.
this whole situation wasn't just about a lost cell phone. it was about my faith and trust in my Heavenly Father. it is so incredible to me that no matter how lame i can be, Heavenly Father still helps me and validates my feelings. I am truly blessed and i know Heavenly Father hears and answers my prayers. He loves me too. Thanks for listening to me.

"Come What May and Love It"

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin passes away last night. I sure loved his talk he gave at the last general conference. "Come what may and love it." He is an incredible man. I am happy to know that he is reunited with his sweet wife. He has left behind many wonderful talks and has been a great example to the world. I love him and will miss him.

are we there yet?

some times i wonder if i am there yet. just a bit tired and wanna go home. but then i think of all the fun i am having and it's all worth it.

the journey is the part to enjoy. president monson's talk, "joy in the journey", has been on my mind. my home teachers gave it as our families lesson on sunday. (by the way, i love our home teachers!) really, i love the part where pres. monson says, "pile up enough tomorrows and you'll have a lot of empty yesterdays". something to that affect. it's so true. i need to enjoy now, do now, be now...... of course i need to plan for the future and i do look forward to what tomorrow will be.

i feel i have been happy with "now". it's been hard to be with someone who was looking forward to tomorrow rather than having "joy in the journey". well yesterday was a great day. our main level was pretty messy. our home teachers came over. i warned them to watch where they were stepping soo they wouldn't trip. it really wasn't too bad. we all sat down and they mentioned how it's hard to keep a house clean with 4 Little boys. i agreed and todd said something that i have been waiting for for years. he has finally accepted that the house will be kinda crazy until the boys grow up and move out. he talked about how he's enjoying this time for what it is. I mentioned that yes we will be in a messy house for years, but we don't give up. we keep trying and trying and trying and..... we all talked about this for a while and it lead right into the lesson, "joy in the journey". what a relief to have todd be, well maybe not the exactly on the same page as me, but he is at least in the same book as i am. :)

totally off the subject, todd laid down the straw all over our lasagna garden. now just the leaves and we are set. i am so excited for this!!!

well off to sleep so i can have joy in my journey tomorrow!

more with the poop.....

today i did a ton!!!! still not every little thing, but i am very pleased. todd and i even did more in the yard. we are turning part of our lawn into a garden. to do this we put down a mixture of newspaper, card board and egg cartons. then we shoveled more poop, or manure, onto that. the final 2 steps will be straw and leaves. this is the lasagna gardening i heard about. supposedly there is no need to remove the grass. we do this layering thing and by the time spring rolls around, it will be nice ground to plant in. we will see if it works. the compost cantainer is 100% finished. i am so excited. i never knew i would get so thrilled over different types of poop. but i sure am!!!!

when i think of my garden, i think of Heavenly Father's love for me. for us, his children. something as disgusting as poop is a blessing in disguise. he has made every thing that we need out of the things on our planet. i never would have thought that there would be any good to come from poop. but there is. i know there is a ton we have no clue about.

well i am getting delirious. need sleep.... so tired...... i am off to enjoy every moment.................. of sleep..... hee hee....

wha happened?.......

planned on doing so much today. where did the time go? time is flying by very quickly. i was going to do laundry, clean the main level of my house, spread manure all over my yard, drop by the store, shine my sink, and do my finances.

so really.... wha happened? what did i do today? i made it to the store with all 4 boys. that's a big one!!! they even all did great. no fighting. no running around. just a fun day at the store. this was a change. i usually want to rip my hair out within the first 2 minutes. christopher and james had earned some money and wanted to buy something. they each chose a small toy. james got a ninja sword and christopher got a bow and arrow. they wanted to get dylan something and said they would buy it for him. he picked out bubbles. (i paid for them.) my boys were sweet to offer though. we went to the check out and each older boy paid for their own toy. i didn't even need to help them count their coins. i just got to stand there and watch. i was impressed. my children are growing so quickly. soon they will all be off on missions, going to college, getting married and having my grandchildren....... i am almost a grandma.

president Monson gave a talk last conference about 'finding joy in the journey'. in this journey of mine i can focus on all the negative, or i can find the joy in it. my attitude makes all the difference. so even though i only did one thing on my list of things to do, i will look at it like this, "wow!!!! i did one thing on my list today!!!! what a great accomplishment! tomorrow i will chip away at the list more." there is a wise woman out there who gave my mom some advice. "make a list and pick 3 things to do on it a day." i can do that. today i started with 1 thing a day. i will have to work up to 3 things. hee hee.
well i'm off to enjoy the rest of my moments of today!

sore muscles....

man i am sore. i must be weak. i am not used to shoveling poop. but it's a good sore. it's a 'i know that i have been doing hard work' sore. i know i will be stronger because of it.

so to become physically stronger we must tear down our muscles so that they may build up even stronger. i wonder if this is a universal way of becoming stronger? when i think of how different situations have made me stronger, they are always ones that tear me down, per say. only through these trials do i grow, or become stronger.

now what i need to do is, when i am 'sore' from 'shoveling poop', or whatever the trial may be, i must look at it as a 'good sore', an 'i know that i have been doing hard work sore', and remember that i WILL become stronger for it. to say bring it on....

now i want to say that i do not grow stronger on my own accord. i am blessed. i could not get through one moment of a day if it not were for the Lords help. from my daily breath to the food on my table. the Lord is there for me. guiding me. comforting me. understanding my needs and how i learn. isn't this a great blessing?!!!

well tomorrow starts a new 'pile of poop'. we will start to shovel away at it. my hope and prayer is that i keep in mind that this is a' good sore'. an 'i know iv'e been doing hard work sore', an ' i know i will become stronger from it' sore. well i'm off to enjoy each moment of today.

poop

well we were just full of it today!!!! we went to a good friend of ours house today, janelle kaul, and got a truck load of cow manure and straw. we are getting ready for our garden in the spring. i am trying to learn more and more about all this gardening stuff. i am so excited for it. my back is a bit sore already from shoveling wheelbarrow after wheelbarrow. really todd did 80% of the work though. jake was a bit fussy and i had to take care of him. but i finally got him to sleep and was able to take over the hard part. todd was worn out by all the work. we've been doing a lot to prepare for this garden.

the other day we made a compost pile container. well todd made it and i held the baby, but we worked together on the design. it is awesome!!!! todd gathered leaves from near my parents house, so that's our start to our pile. when it is all composted we will spread it around all the areas we are growing things. we are planning to grow all kinds of things. tomatoes, carrots, garlic, green beans, cucumbers, lettuce, strawberries, squash, zucchini, onions, potatoes, and more. we will see how it really goes.

i am kinda not focusing on todd and the new job. he starts soon and i am not ready. i really do that for a ton of things in my life. i don't think about it until i have to. so once he starts, i will have to think about it. right? i do that for labor too. don't think about it until i am in it. works out GREAT! not sure how that will work in this situation. i will try to think about it.... maybe tomorrow.

well, off to enjoy every minute of today. tomorrow will be here all to soon.

banana chips

well i bought bananas. they were on sale. so i am making banana chips. hope they are good.
the compost pile project is almost complete. a few hinges and we are there. that's really it for now. we are still pluggin' along.

it's been a good morning....

well i had a wonderful sleep last night. i fell asleep without getting ready for bed though. i must have been tired. jake, my 4 month old, slept great! dylan my 2 year old was in our bed around 4a.m.ish. he was hyper. i finally went to get him a bottle of milk and he went to sleep. so there where 4 in the bed. i still slept great!
for a while when i was pregnant with jake, i thought that i would want a break from children and babies in my bed. ( i had had at least one child sleeping with me for the past 7 years.) so i got a co-sleeper bed and hooked it to the side of my bed in preparation for the new little one. turns out, i don't want to have only 2 in the bed. my little jake will be all grown up too soon. i will never again have the opportunity to have him nestled next to me. the bond that i feel with this little fellow is so strong. i feel like a mother koala or some animal, where the baby is connected to the mother for the first year or so. i wouldn't have it any other way. thought i might want a bit more freedom, but, nope!!! I love it. they grow too quickly for that.
i am trying to enjoy every second of this short time of my life. i know that i will miss it sorely when it is over, but then i will try to enjoy every moment of that time too. here i go to enjoy today.

hello......

testing, testing, 1, 2, 3.......... is there anyone out there? just trying out this whole blogging thing. iv'e heard a bit about it and am trying it out. sounds like fun.

well todd just got hired to work a second job at u.p.s. i just pray for the strength to get through this time. he's excited. i am excited too. a bit nervous too though. the lord will bless us in our efforts. he always has.

well that's my first blog. we will see how this goes. :)